Dollar and Rupee
Dollar is becoming stronger because....
the stick in the Symbol of Dollar is vertical and gives support to the Dollar. But...
the stick in Rupee symbol is horizontal ....and gets stuck in the wrong place !
सोमवार, १९ ऑगस्ट, २०१३
मंगळवार, २४ एप्रिल, २०१२
Why
is Singhvi Shaky ?
1)
He likes
to shake his legs…
2)
His
English is Shakespearish…
3)
This is
the second time he is resigning…
4)
He likes
his sex the Sheikh’s way…
5)
Like a
real sheikh, this Singhvi CD is for Rahul’s education, from his mentor !
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How Singhvi CD is a Public
Issue…
1)
Mr.
Singhvi is an MP and so is a Public Servant. How he gets to go to a prostitute
where as Aam Aadmi does not…
2)
Mr.
Singhvi like Mr. Clinton, seems to be doing a Blow job. Blowing his job may be his
personal matter but as per traditional Indian Sex Catalogue of KamSutra it is
not so Indian and goes against the fabric of Indian Sex Traditions and damages Indian
sexual practices.
3)
There is
no mention of “promise of judgeship to the lady in the act” in the CD. Then is
she performing this for Ministership or Chief Justiceship ? Nation needs to
know our future Judges, Ministers and Chief Justices..
4)
People of
eminence generally engage drivers for private duty. How is Mr. Singhvi engaging
a Screw Driver ?
5)
As per Mr.
Khurshid, the CD is totally a private business. Then why a Public Court has to issue an injunction
against it’s publication.
6)
For most
of the time, Mr. Singhvi appears to be standing while performing the sexual
acts in the CD. Is this the reason, he was chairing a standing committee ?
---------------------------------
मंगळवार, २७ मार्च, २०१२
Obsession of the written
word !
The defense minister Mr. A.K.Antony, like
all common public is having a deep obsession with the written word. As per his
report in Rajya Sabha, the Army Chief had not given the complaint in writing then,
nor has he given it now. Still the Minister has now ordered CBI enquiry and CBI
is scheduled to take a written statement from the Army Chief and the same will
be considered as the written complaint in this case.
There is a great disbelief in the common
public that all important contracts and documents in the life of people, has to
be in the written word. But it is not so. The greatest contract in any man’s
life is “Marriage”, and remember how it is done ? You just have to say “I do”
and you have committed yourself to the biggest commitment of your life. And may
be you suffer the consequences of the same, later !
The Biggest money transactions in money
market are done verbally. The greatest auctions of arts, antiques or ( as
recommended by our CAGs ) of 2-G or 3-G or coal blocks are all done verbally. Like,
…the auctioneer shouts… “ 2 million one time, 2 million 2 times and 2 million 3
times…and now it is sold to….for…”
When you are travelling in the most
costly transport, say, a jumbo jet, the pilot’s decisions are all verbal and
not written. It is another matter that all these are recorded by the black box
for posterity. But decisions are all oral and not written.
All the languages of the world strive, develop,
expand or die away, all because of the situation of spoken word. If lot of
people speak it, it thrives, lest it dies a quiet death. Even if heaps of
written words exist in any language, but if there are no people to speak it,
then it has to be declared as the dead language. Our Sanskrit has suffered the
same destiny.
Even legally there are many judgments
which are delivered orally. As for resignations, they say legally even a verbal
resignation is valid. With these standards, the defense minister holding his
hand on the forehead, after the Army Chief, told him about the bribe offer of
14 crores, should be legitimately considered as his resignation. And we should
relieve him forthwith !
-----------------------------------------
शुक्रवार, १६ मार्च, २०१२
The Bell call’s—Answer !
Alexander Graham Bell
invented the telephone and the first call he made was to his Assistant,
Mr.Watson . That call was like this: “Mr.Watson, I want you to come here !”
There is no mention of how
Mr.Watson answered that call but we can re-create the answer now as:
Watson-1 : “Show me your
location on the GPS and I will come soon !”
Watson-2: “I am almost
there and right now I am parking the car. See you soon !”
Watson-3: “I am stuck in
Traffic Jam ! Can we meet tomorrow instead ?”
Watson-4: “Mr.Graham Bell,
your girlfriend had called to remind you that you are running 2 hours late for
the dinner date tonight !”
Watson-5: “Incoming call
is not free for me, so if you are paying for this call, I will answer soon !”
-----------------------------------------
शुक्रवार, १७ फेब्रुवारी, २०१२
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Twitter-witty----5
Rahul , in a tearing hurry !
It is not that Rahul, is in a tremendous hurry to finish the UP elections and occupy the Prime Ministership. He is addressing at least 10/15 meetings in this election campaign. This Wind-Wheel tour is definitely showing his hurry. But do you know, why is he in such a tearing hurry ?
His mom, Sonia Gandhi, at last has taken her parent's job seriously and has short-listed six bio-datas from the "Shaadi.com " and has sent that short list to him through special commandoes. After the election is over, Rahul is to proceed abroad with this short-list and.....then we will know who is our next Mrs.Prime Minister ! The same short-list was in his hands and he was going over the same while thinking about the speech to be delivered. And suddenly, in a hurry Rahul tore that list !
Now, he is searching a Cyber Cafe to log in on Shaadi.com and search the girls' email, names etc of the girls who were on that short-list. This is the time for good people to come to help the prince....for that short-list !
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शुक्रवार, ६ जानेवारी, २०१२
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Twitter Witty----4
Fatwa on Crackers, Cracked
If you do well in
any exam, it is fashionable these days to say "you have cracked the exam."
And we have millions of exam-crackers these days. It reminds us of another kind,
the fire-crackers. But recently these have been declared by a Fatwa to be un-Islamic,
both its manufacturing and marketing.
The leading
Islamic seminary, Darul Uloom Deoband, it may seem, has cracked an examination
of fireworks. Somebody involved in manufacturing of crackers had asked the
seminary to examine the cracker-business. It is common knowledge that lots of
Muslim population is presently engaged in the crackers business. You can sight
the major wholesale shops of crackers on Mohammad Ali Road in Mumbai. This address
is proof enough, that it is an Islamic business. So, for the seminary to
declare a Fatwa against it, is no less than cracking an exam.
In fact, Deoband
need not have done the hair-splitting of Sharia Law and should have declared
cracker business un-Islamic simply by the official meaning of Islam, which is
peace. Then how can the crackers, which by their bangs, pierce this peace can
be declared peaceful ?
One might
be tempted to compare the cracker business on its principal quality, i.e., making
loud noise. If it is considered un-Islamic just because it makes a pretentious
loud noise, then that criterion has lots of other contestants , like , say the
daily "ajhaans" or the prayers over the loudest loud speakers and the
irritable "taashaa" leading in most of the Muslim processions. Both
should have been held to be un-Islamic, just by the dint of its decibels. No
other religion gets this concession to be heard by the followers over the loud
speakers and at all the wee hours of the days and nights. But that still stays
as Islamic.
The
criterion that Deoband used in deciding whether the cracker business is Islamic
or not is "the wasteful use of money". This seems to be the right
noise to make. Just look at the prices of fire crackers these days and whether wasteful
or not, these are easily to be conceded as extremely costly by any standards. Thousand
fire-crackers woven in a garland and fondly called as "Hazaar ki lad",
may make a noise on a calm Diwali morning, say, of 100 decibels. And if it
costs Rs.1000, then it turns out to be Rs.10 per decibel. Compare this with the
real fire-work of say Bomb-blast. It may cost some Rs. 1 lakh and would achieve
a level of 120 decibels. This comes to Rs. 833 per decibel and would definitely
be declared as un-Islamic by its sheer cost and effect.
If you
organise a meeting of say 500 people and if it costs Rs. 25,000 including the
hall and chairs rentals and the loud speakers and if we calculate its cost per decibel
,( police standard for any public meeting is not more than 80 decibels) , the
calculator will give us a figure of Rs. 312.5 per decibel, which is still
costlier than the "hazaar ki lad". It will, no doubt, be declared un-Islamic
as it is "a wasteful use of money". So, beware all those planning to
hold a meeting either in favor or against this Fatwa, it will be an un-Islamic
act, by Deoband standards !
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